Little Jack's Corner

Enough with the Temper Tantrums!

Whew.

There comes a time when all parents throw up their hands and feel like running, screaming, naked through the night.

Who knew my time would come only 16 months after giving birth to this perfect, quiet, beautiful angel??

Jack-Evan, over the past 2 months, has finely tuned the art of the temper tantrum. He’s in his terrible two’s – and not even 2 yet! Sometimes I can’t blame the poor fellow though. Growing up is hard to do. After all, he is just learning to walk now so his physical abilities have yet to catch up with his desires (crawling just does NOT cut it in the speed department anymore). He’s also testing out all of his new found skills, and sometimes they find him instead, such as when he attempts to unbuckle his seatbeat but just. can’t. mash. it hard enough. (Cue high pitched scream). And woe forbid should Mommy take 2.1 extra seconds to change a diaper or wash a face or arrive at his side. (Cue 6 more high pitched screams.)

It seems like my whole life right now is one giant scream and tantrum. Every 5 minutes it’s something else. Just tonight, after Jack completely melted during my attempt to wash his face, I asked him, “Why on earth can’t you just be normal for one day?!” Then I remembered (for the 50th time), that he WAS being normal. Normal for a toddler that is. (Cue high pitched scream…from Mommy). Frustration and lack of communication ability rules his life right now. Earlier today he was so mad, he literally turned red during his tantrum, had both fists closed in a tight ball, and was shaking….HARD. It was quite a new addition to his tantrum repretoire and I hope he doesn’t remember to do it again tomorrow! Thankfully he didn’t shoot his head backward at rocket speed like he normally does during a tantrum. Just as long as he doesn’t connect the turning red / fist balled up / head thrown back dots, we may survive this stage. I suppose his brain is just so active now that it carries him much further than his physical abilities allow him to truly go. He understand what we say to him, yet when he tries to convey to us what he is thinking, or when he tries to do normal “adult” things, it just doesn’t quite work the same way. (Cue another high pitched scream). It makes me wish like crazy I would have taught him sign language the moment he left the birth canal.

Thankfully, I am noticing more words erupting each day. He currently says: Mama, Mom, Hey, DaDa, Papa, Dog, Duck, Juice, Bubba (my uncle), Nurse (our word for breastfeeding), Go, I love you, Stop, No, and Yes. He has said “Hey Mama” and “Hey Dada” and “I love mama / dada” but other than that he hasn’t put 2 words together yet. There may be some more individual words, but I can’t think of them at the moment. Within the past 2 weeks I’ve also noticed him becoming more adept at pointing at something when he wants to communicate. I really do enjoy this new stage we’re entering now that each day means we communicate better and better. It’s just so heartwarming to say various long things to him and have him understand completely what we have said! It still amazes me when I ask him to do something he’ll go do it without any physical prompting (Go find your truck, Where is your duck? Get your stroller and we’ll go for a walk!, It’s time to eat, Papa is coming in the door, etc).

And mentioning trucks and strollers! Whew. Besides temper tantrums, he is one active little boy. He hardly ever stops to rest, unless it’s to climb up in my lap and ask with pleading eyes “Nur?? Nur??” (Nurse). I’ve been trying to wean him from daytime nursing for the past 2 weeks, so that is taking a toil on Jack as well. (Cue extremely loooong high pitched, totally devastated scream). Otherwise, he’s always on the go, pushing something, pulling something, and climbing. He doesn’t care for TV much, unless he’s the one pushing the buttons (he’ll stand in front of the TV and change channels all day if we let him! He’s obsessed with pushing buttons! Both on the remote and on the TV front). That’s mostly due to the fact that we don’t watch much TV though. I do hope he becomes interested in Seseme Street or Sid the Science Kid sooner or later. He does enjoy Mister Rogers and will almost sit through an entire show, but unfortunately our PBS took it off the air! (Cue extremely high pitched scream from Mommy).

All in all, Jack-Evan is coming into his own little personality with the dawning of each new day. He’s a very vocal, extremely strong-willed little person who believes he’s 10 feet tall – and becomes easily frustrated when the world shows him he isn’t. He adores animals, meeting new people, and impressing the ladies. He’ll do anything for a cheer & handclap, tends to be shy around groups of kids his own age (but loves one-on-one time), and is determined to make it on his own in this big, wide world. However, his biggest confidence boost seems to come when Mommy is close by cheering him on, so as long as Mommy is waiting in the wing when it’s finally time to snuggle and nap, the world is a fine place to live.

But enough with the temper tantrums. Those can go ASAP.

( Yeh, right, who am I kidding? Welcome to parenthood….Tantrums and all.)

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Note: This was written 3 days ago and I just remembered it was in my draft folder. Would you believe that since then, a miracle seems to have happened! Thursday morning, I felt like I woke up in an alternate universe. Surely my real family was desperately searching for me somewhere! See… Not only did Jack-Evan make it through 2 full meals that day using very polite manners (AND without throwing anything on the floor) but he made it all day with only one tantrum! Perhaps God does feel pity for haggard and harried Moms after all, because he certainly has been smiling down on me lately. haha!

Pregnancy — 5 comments
24
Sep 09

Baby #2 – 1 Month Pregnant & How It All Came About

Thank you all for the well wishes and congratulations on my last post about baby #2!

We’re definitely excited. My first doctor’s appointment isn’t until October 6, so I don’t have an official due date yet. Sometime next May seems to be a good guesstimate though, as we first learned about the pregnancy with Jack-Evan in early September as well (2007). My LMP this time was in early August (it was July 31 with Jack). So the timing is exactly the same from what I can tell.

By the time this baby arrives, Jack-Evan will be 24 months old. Two years feel like a perfect age gap for siblings! It’s what we’ve always wanted for our kids, although we’ve never “planned” it that way. We just let what happens, happen. So far, it’s happening nicely.

How it happened? (Oh no, not that!) What I mean, see, we left for Upstate New York on Sept. 9 for a week visit with my husband’s family. I knew then that I was *almost* late, and I had the strange feeling that I might be pregnant. I let Kevin in on it a day or so before we returned to South Carolina. Well, *it* never came, and by the time we finished the 20 hour car trip back home on Tuesday, Sept. 15, we were so anxious that Kevin headed to Walgreens that night to pick up a pregnancy test (at 9:30 nonetheless! Bless his heart!).

Well, Kevin started some popcorn whilst I took the test (with Jack-Evan playing at my feet, of course. No privacy for poor Mommy.)

One blue line appeared immediately, but the next line didn’t show up. My heart sunk. (Kerplunk). Oh well. Not pregnant, I thought. No big deal, right? (Wrong, I was devastated)

I put the test down, stood up, sighed, casually picked up the box and noticed that the line that had appeared immediately was the “yes, my dear, you definitely are pregnant” line. I grabbed the test, and ‘shore nuff, the 2nd “control” line was now coming in strong.

I seriously started shaking. I mean, 23 seconds ago I was disappointed that I wasn’t pregnant. Now that I WAS, here I am, shaking in fear like a leaf in October. I yelled out to Kevin, “Are you watching wrestling???” (a throw back to what he was doing the night I told him about the pregnancy with our #1, Jack-Evan). He said, “Ummm…nooo.” Then he ran into the bathroom and asked “Why???”. I silently showed him the test. Of course his next words were “Are you sure?!” Then he started sniffling his nice, sweet man-tears. He was crying and I was scared to death.

He was far more excited than I was at that moment. And I wasn’t quite sure how to articulate anything I was feeling to him.

I’m not sure why fear gripped me so hard during those few seconds. I suppose it was the shock. Well, “shock” not in a sense that I wasn’t expecting the outcome (I was and had thought so for a week), but “shock” as in “Wow, this IS reality and my life is about to change yet again.” The deep fear, I suppose, may have also come from the fact that since this is my 2nd time around, I KNOW all of the pain I will endure and the trials. My fears during pregnancy #1 were mainly shadow fears, the kind where I was so new at it that once something happened, it was over and done with. I could easily pass off all of those fears as pretty much “unfounded” for the most part. But now, I DO know how terrible contractions & labor & crowning feels. I DO know how my body may be reacting throughout this pregnancy. And now I have 8 months in which to anticipate everything I KNOW will happen. Tiredness, numerous needle pokes, mind-numbing doctor visits, and excrutiating pain – it’s all very real, and the memories of my last pregnancy woes all came crashing down on my harder than a kamikaze fighter.

Also, the thought of change was part of it too. Here we are, settled into our routines. Jack-Evan is my little star, my main squeeze, my little hambone that makes me laugh during the quieter moments when he’s not erupting into one of his famous temper tantrums. He’s my little poopie head, you know. My “Tooter” (as we usually call him! He answers to that better than “Jack”!). Having another child is not just something that is a part of mine and Kevin’s life – it will also change Jack’s life forever. Our decision to expand our family will impact him, and he doesn’t even know it yet. His life will change. Our lives will change. Routines will change. We will have to yet again find a new “normal”.

So anyway, the reaction I had that night was so deep that Kevin even half-jokingly accused me of not being excited and happy. Perhaps it was the look of blatant fear in my eyes? Or maybe it was because I wasn’t joining him in the happy dance he was doing with Jack-Evan. I was just standing there, frozen, with a bajillion thoughts erupting in my mind. Of course I was excited…. in my head. In my head, I desparately wanted another child. Being an “only child” (and hating it my whole life!), my highest goal in family planning was to have at least 4 children. But my logical thoughts and dreams for the future took backseat to the terribly deep feelings of dread that my body dived into that night. It was just pure, raw emotion that swept over me. I would have never ever expected to feel that way! And I’m almost ashamed to admit it for fear that I would be perceived as a terrible mother! I mean, only mothers who hate children and never want more, feel their hearts sink to China upon learning of another pregnancy…..right? Well, at least that’s what I’ve always figured. But nonetheless, that’s what happened to me. I mean, I know the flip side of pregnancy too – the outcome, the beautiful baby awaiting me in the end, the joyous feelings of seeing new life arrive. So how can I explain my primortal reaction? I can’t.

In the week since learning of the new baby though, those initial feelings have subsided, and have been replaced by the typical excitement that washes over expectant moms. I’ve once again found myself stopping on TLC when I catch a sniff of “A Baby Story” wafting by the airwaves. And once again, I found my buggy pulling me haphazardly towards the pretty pink (or blue?) baby outfits that are just oooohhh so darling. I’ve also been cleaning like mad the past few days! Just today I shipped 4 big bags full of stuff to the Goodwill. We’re clearning out our guest room (more like “junk” room!) to make way for either a nursery for a girl or a play room for Jack (if we have another boy).

As for prenatal care this time….. With my 1st pregnancy, I was quite naive. Back then, I started out the 9 month journey with the assumption that doctors knew best. I ended with the knowledge that if you do not take control of your own pregnancy, things can (and will) turn out quite unpleasant. So this time around, I have decided to utilize our state’s only natural “birthing center” and a midwife. (My unpleasant experiences with prenatal care during my 1st pregnancy will probably come out in future posts, so I’ll save my ranting and raving for then.) I’m not sure yet if I want to go with natural / waterbirth (something the center offers) or epidural at the hospital next door with this one yet, but at least I’ll have the option of what I want to do. This time I KNOW I will be “in control”. And that means a lot to me – expecially after having the doctor try to force pitocin into me to speed up labor at 8 CM dialated – when I did NOT need it.

Anyway, thanks again for all the well wishes! It’s great to see I still have some loyal reader friends here. I must be going now though. I’m quite nauseated and dizzy….. unlike my 1st pregnancy (where the sickness totally passed me by), I have experienced morning-sickness-at-night for the past 2 weeks! Tonight seems to be the worst. Guess that’s what I get for staying up after midnight though, I suppose.

Little Jack’s BIG Announcement

(Voiced by 16 month old Jack-Evan, Typed by Mommy)

Waiting...

Once upon a time I wasn’t here.

Then suddenly……. here I was.

Before I knew it, a whole year had passed and I had learned so much about this big, wide world.

Now I have to pass along all of my knowledge to someone else…

….because that’s just what big brothers do, I suppose.

Now We Are One — No comments
31
Aug 09

So what do you do when…

You just can’t think of anything to say?

I’ve been in a writing slump this entire summer. I suppose it’s because much of my impulse to “write” is pacified on twitter and facebook. Or it could be due to all of the home upgrade projects we’ve been doing since May. I dunno. But nothing is hitting me.

I’ve thought about just posting updates on Jack-Evan, but who wants to read just plain ol’ updates of someone else’s child? Even if he happens to be the cutest, sweetest, most lovable little man in the world, thankyouverymuch. But still, I must have creativity in the things I post. But it’s not happening.

So here I am, just stopping in to say hello to my, oh, say, 3 remaining readers. (Hello!)

Jack-Evan is about to turn 16 months old in a few days. The other day my mom, Aunt Mae, Jack-Evan and I went on a day trip. On the drive back, I remarked to my Aunt that I couldn’t believe a few of my cousins were in upper level high school. I still felt they should be in Junior High or something. In my astonishment, I remarked “Where in the world did the last year of my life go??”

My aunt, without missing a beat, replied “He’s sitting here in the backseat….”

….

Jack-Evan isn’t quite walking yet, but he is standing (hurray!) and taking a few steps once in a while. The doctor says he just needs to get his confidence up. His Papa says that Jack’s just simply figured out that the best way to travel in life is to let everyone else carry you!

He’s also picking up new words and actions each day. The past few weeks, we’ve been working on body parts. ”Belly” is his favorite, and if you ask him where someone’s belly is he tries to raise their shirt to show you. The only embarrassing part is when he decides that he wants to point out “boobie” instead and raises the shirt too high. Jack & his daddy have also been working on showing their happiness with a drink. After taking a sip from any drink, Jack-Evan will pull away, open his mouth, and go “Ahhhhhhh” in whispery delight. He even does it after nursing. The first time he did it after nursing, I almost dropped him because I was laughing so hard.

Ohhh the delights of motherhood, right?!

Now We Are One — 2 comments
19
Aug 09

Fun with DaDa

For the most part, Jack-Evan has always been a Momma’s boy. But here recently, he’s been seeing his daddy in a whole new light! So much so that he now cries for DaDa when he leaves for work in the morning! It makes Kevin so proud that his son is *finally* showing strong attatchment to him.

DSC04764 by you.

DSC04766 by you.

DSC04767 by you.

DSC04772 by you.

DSC04773 by you.

Now We Are One — No comments
17
Aug 09

What do you do when you’re dog tired?

DSC04728 by you.

Why, you fall asleep with mommy, of course!

Thoughts from Mom — No comments
13
Aug 09

Wow…a month already?

Oh goodness! I didn’t realize I had been away from this little blog for a month now!

This summer has just been so busy, busy, busy that I’m not quite certain what happened to June, much less July. The stark realization that it’s the middle of AUGUST just hit me earlier.

This summer has been full of home renovation for us. We moved into this house in early 2006 and wasn’t quite sure at first if we would be planting roots here or not, but at the end of last year things just felt right to settle in more permanently. Our first goal was to refinance the house. That was accomplished in December when we were able to go from a 30 year fixed at 8.99 percent to a whoppingly low 15 year fixed at 5.25 percent! Our payments only rose $40.00 per month, but the time left to pay it off was cut in half. (whoohoo!)

Then, this past May, we haphazardly began our treck into home renovation and making this home “ours”. It all started with a bad flea infestation in our bedroom carpet. Now, we can handle almost anything around here ‘cept for those danged fleas. So out goes the old carpet (right out the bedroom window! It was quite a funny sight) and in comes the new laminate wood floor to match with the other parts of our house.

Well, it looked so nice I decided, why stop there? So we painted the room and had ceramic tile installed in the adjoining master bath. We were so inspired by that time that we also painted the whole house exterior, built a large arbor with 5′ country swing (and planed muscadine grape vines!), excavated a large spot for a flower bed / vegetable garden in the front, installed window boxes, built a large addition to our back deck, had a 24′ above ground steel wall pool installed, renovated our utility room with new shelving, and tinkered around with (what seems like) 50 million other little tiny miscellaneous odd & end jobs that we’ve always wanted done.

Now we’re 40% finished with a privacy wood fence in the back yard.

Whew.

Talk about exhausting! And we’re still not finished. So many projects were started at once that we haven’t wrapped up everything yet on some of them. Our original thoughts were that it would take us all summer, but now we seem to be scooting on into fall as well with these projects. Hopefully they’ll be done by winter, although we seem to be on such a roll now that who knows what we’ll think of doing next?

Also, another bright side, this entire year my “resolution” was to de-clutter my life. Now, if you know me, you know I’ve been a huge pack-rat / out & out hoarder my whole life. At one point in time I was even unable to throw away the most rediculous of things due to the silly sentimental attachments my mind placed on them. That paper plate from 4th of July? Such fond memories we had together! That random movie ticket stub? What a treasure! The broken crayon from when I was 3? How could you think of getting rid of that? Old high school notebooks? No way!!! And let’s not even start thinking about that pair of sneakers from junior high.

Yes folks, that was me.

But times have changed. I was so determined to finally declutter my life this year! And it’s worked. I started off back in early 2009 by clearing out my clothes. Then I moved on to getting rid of various bits & pieces of my former life (premarriage – early 20s & teen years), throwing away, purging, and donating. Now, after months of chugging along at it little by little, I look around and see huge progress! Our home not only looks 1,000 lbs lighter, but the mental weight of hoarding all of that “stuff” (stress that I didn’t even know was there) has disappeared. The added benefit is that I am finally able to recognize and throw away truly useless stuff without having a heart attack! It feels AMAZING with a capital UH.

So anyway, along with all of the house projects this summer, I’ve been in full force de-clutter mode also, purging and sending bags and bags of stuff out – to be donated and to be trashed – every single week.

And then there’s Jack-Evan who’s been keeping me busy.

He’s 15 months old now (where does the time go??) and such a little hambone. He finds humor in the oddest situations and starts this wonderful belly laugh that gets us all going. He hasn’t started walking yet, although he cruises along holding onto things (or even hands) really well. I started getting a tad worried about him when he wasn’t walking when he turned one, but multiple souces (books, friends, TLC, even the doctor) have said that it’s quite normal for many children not to walk until the latter half of their 2nd year, especially if others in the family didn’t. And apparantly many of the males in my family didn’t walk until they were almost 2 years old (from what I’ve learned this summer!). So although it didn’t stamp out my motherly worry all the way, it did help take the edge off.

Lately we’ve been practicing helping him walk a lot, encouraging him to walk beside us holding his hand (instead of us carrying him everywhere as we tend to do). He just loves to “go walking” and will stop what he’s doing to stand up and walk when we ask him to! He’s always been afraid to let go though and would cry if we tried to let go of his finger in the middle of the room. But guess what? The practice seems to have paid off. He finally stood UP on his own yesterday, and stood there for 10 seconds. The little bugger was so thrilled with himself that he stood there giggling the whole time looking proud as punch. My parents and I were all in the same room when he did it, so of course we were all on our feet cheering him on, dancing around, clapping and jumping up and down and all that silly embarrassing stuff family does in the privacy of their own homes. It was as if something clicked with him. One minute he was sitting on the ground, the next minute he just….stood up. Bam. Right in the middle of the bare floor. He did it 5 more times over the next half hour too. Then, later last night he treated his dad to a spectacular “up & down” standing show too. The courage to take a step didn’t come, but it won’t be long now that he realizes he can balance himself without holding on to anything!

Thoughts from Mom — 3 comments
13
Jul 09