You know those emails that show up in your inbox?
The ones you usually delete immediately due to the glaringly obvious FWD in the subject line?
I don’t know about you, but I tend to hate forwards. I haven’t forwarded more than 4 things in 14 years. Seriously. And don’t get me started on the chain letters where a little headless girl will appear in your closet at 2:02 PM and kill your dog if you don’t forward to 10,000 of your closest friends in the next 30 seconds.
But every now and then I’ll get a forward I actually enjoy. As in, enjoy so much that tiny globs of spit has collected on Jack because of was laughing so hard (sorry sweetie). Usually it’s the ones that contain one liners, sarcastic quips, or blonde jokes. I LOVE blonde jokes. Upon finishing up one of these emails, I usually immediately call up my dad and share the humor. He’s as nutty as I am.
Here’s one I liked so much that I saved it as a Text file and refer to it when I’m glum.
Ok, I really don’t refer to it that often, but I did think it would make a nice post. And perhaps…just perhaps…someone else has my sense of wacked up humor and will find these funny. 
1. How Do You Catch a Unique Rabbit?
Unique Up On It.
2. How Do You Catch a Tame Rabbit?
Tame Way.
3. How Do Crazy People Go Through The Forest ?
They Take The Psycho Path
4. How Do You Get Holy Water?
You Boil The Hell Out Of It.
5. What Do Fish Say When They Hit a Concrete Wall?
Dam!
6. What Do Eskimos Get From Sitting On The Ice too Long?
Polaroid’s
7. What Do You Call a Boomerang That Doesn’t work?
A Stick
8. What Do You Call Cheese That isn’t Yours?
Nacho Cheese.
9. What Do You Call Santa’s Helpers?
Sub ordinate Clauses.
10. What Do You Call Four Bullfighters In Quicksand?
Quattro Sinko.
11. What Do You Get From a Pampered Cow?
Spoiled Milk.
12. What Do You Get When You Cross a Snowman With a Vampire?
Frostbite.
13. What Lies At The Bottom Of The Ocean And Twitches?
A Nervous Wreck.
14. What’s The Difference Between Roast Beef And Pea Soup?
Anyone Can Roast Beef.
15. Where Do You Find a Dog With No Legs?
Right Where You Left Him.
16. Why Do Gorillas Have Big Nostrils?
Because They Have Big Fingers.
17. Why Don’t Blind People Like To Sky Dive?
Because It Scares The Dog.
18. What Kind Of Coffee Was Served On The Titanic?
Sanka.
19. What Is The Difference Between a Harley And a Hoover ?!
The Location of the Dirt Bag
20. Why Did Pilgrims’ Pants Always Fall Down?
Because They Wore Their Belt Buckle On Their Hat.
21. What’s The Difference Between a Bad Golfer And a Bad Skydiver?
A Bad Golfer Goes, Whack, Dang!
A Bad Skydiver Goes Dang! Whack.
22. How Are a Texas Tornado And a Tennessee Divorce The Same?
Somebody’s Gonna Lose A Trailer
OH, OH, OH!!
That was just what we needed! My mom and Grandma and I just spent the last ten minutes (at midnight of course) laughing until our sides hurt and we couldn’t see straight through the tears.
My favorite was the fish one.
Amber (Bringing Good Home) » LOL! Glad I could brighten someone’s day…er…night..